I loved Matthew. Truly.
“Lila,” he said softly.
“What?”
“Maybe later.”
That made me look up. Before I could ask, Julian tugged at his collar.
“Sorry,” he said. “It’s really warm in here.”
He took off his jacket and rolled up his sleeves.
I saw the anchor first, small and dark on his forearm. Then I saw the letter curled into the rope.
E.
My fork slipped from my fingers and hit the plate hard enough to make Lila jump.
Julian tugged at his collar.
“Mom!”
I stared at the tattoo.
I was there when Leo got it. He was seventeen, reckless, and grinning through the pain. It was an anchor because he said I kept him steady.
The E was for Emily.
“Where did you get that?” I asked.
Julian looked down at his arm.
He didn’t look surprised.
“Where did you get that?
***
“My father had one just like it,” he said quietly. “I got it for him.”
Lila pushed back her chair. “What’s going on?”
Julian reached under his shirt and pulled out a chain.
A silver heart locket swung against his palm.
It was mine.
There was a scratch near the hinge. I knew that scratch because I had made it with a bobby pin in the girls’ bathroom at prom, trying to tuck Leo’s picture inside before the dance.
“I got it for him.
I stood too fast.
“Where did you get that?”
Julian’s calm finally broke.
“I’ve been trying to find you for over ten years,” he said. “I wanted to tell you the truth.”
Lila stared at him. “What truth?”
I held out my hand. “Give it to me.”
He placed the locket in my palm.
For a second, I hated him for bringing my past into Lila’s future.
“I wanted to tell you the truth.
“You knew who I was?” I asked.
“Not at first.”
“When did you know?”
Julian swallowed. “Three months ago.”
Lila went pale. “Three months?”
“I saw your prom photo,” Julian said.
Lila blinked. “What prom photo?”
“You knew who I was?
“The one in your scrapbook,” he said. “The night you were showing me pictures for our engagement slideshow. You had one page with your baby photos, your dad, your mom, and that old prom picture tucked in the back.”
Julian looked at me. “I recognized my father.”
“Your father?” I whispered.
He swallowed. “Leo was my dad.”
Everything went silent.
Lila gripped the chair. “No. Wait. Mom, that’s not… I’m not…”
“Leo was my dad.
“No,” I said quickly, taking her hands. “No, sweetheart. Don’t let your mind go there. Leo was someone I loved long before you were even thought of.”
“My mother married him in 1990,” Julian said.
“Then why didn’t you tell us?” Lila asked.
His jaw tightened. “Because I was scared.”
“Of losing me?”
“Yes.”
“So you lied instead?”
“I delayed the truth.”
“I was scared.
“That is a dressed-up lie,” I snapped. “You don’t get to bring my past into my daughter’s future and decide when we are ready to hear it.”
“I know,” he said. “I handled it wrong.”
Lila wiped her cheek.
His eyes filled. “I kept telling myself I needed the right time.”
“There is no right time for a lie,” I said.
He nodded once, ashamed. “You’re right.”
“I handled it wrong.
I pointed to the locket in his hand. “Then show me what you came to show me.”
“It’s in my car.”
“Go get it.”
Lila whispered, “Mom…”
“No,” I said. “If he has carried my past for three months, I can wait three minutes.”
***
Julian returned with a brown leather satchel and set it on my dining table like an offering.
Inside were letters, photographs, and an old envelope with my name written across the front.
“Go get it.
The first photo was from prom. Leo and I were standing under silver streamers. I was in my red dress, and he was wearing his crooked bow tie. His arm was around my waist.
I heard him like he was standing in the kitchen.
“Smile, Em. One day, we’ll show this to our kids.”
I pressed my fingers to my mouth.
Julian pulled out a folded letter. “Dad died six months ago. He left this for you. He made me promise to find you. I searched for a long time, but it was difficult because your name changed, and Dad only knew your maiden name.”
